Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.

I do a lot of laughing during sex.

(Now that I’ve actually written that out, I can see a bunch of ways that that admission can be taken badly. Fear not: it’s never malicious. Wicked, maybe, but never malicious or cruel.)

I’m not as lucky as this gal.  Rather than a delicious fortune cookie, I got today’s fortune from spam. I have to admit, I like it a whole lot better than yesterday’s, “Your friends will admire your bravery.”

My spam fortune:

You will be desired by any woman that is walking by.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

October 11th

Yesterday
	12:00am	@Danacea Morning! Try harder tonight. I’ll be rooting for you.
	12:00am	@Cassandra_K Did you ring the lube? Or…whatever?
	12:05am	@Cassandra_K I’ll make a note of that. *s*
	12:10am	Awesome Highlighter has a Firefox plugin now. It’s so much more awesome. Awesomer…? Hm.
	12:11am	@Cassandra_K Triscuits are biscuits that will try anything, right?
	12:15am	@Akelaa Hey, sexy! http://www.awesomehighlighter.com/ Sounds simple, but it’s neat: highlight, make a note, & you get a short url to post.
	12:18am	@Akelaa Like this: http://awurl.com/a8Mr8NQ1i <3
	12:19am	@Cassandra_K Oooh. I have not had cheese in…too long.
	12:20am	@Akelaa Yay! You’ll love it. It’s handy for damn near everything. I use it on my blog sometimes. More often for Twitter, though.
	12:20am	@Akelaa Oh, plus it saves your history and shows you stats on how many times it was visited.
	12:22am	And just cuz it’s too funny not to share: http://mingle2.com/dating/unicorn For unicorn fans, with love.
	12:24am	@Akelaa Notice that you can edit the highlights by clicking on them. :)
	12:35am	@fidlr Before you eat or before they do?
	12:39am	@Cassandra_K Mine, too. : )
	1:02am	Oh god, Fox women are upset that Sarah Palin’s Newsweek photo *wasn’t* retouched. Using words like “horrifying” and “mortifying”.
	1:04am	“Any woman that sees this [Palin] cover would be SHOCKED and HORRIFIED” because it’s untouched, mind you. http://tinyurl.com/3wsh4h
	1:06am	We should all boycott Newsweek for (supposedly) prettifying Barak Obama, but not Palin. Dumbass elitist liberal media!
	1:07am	@SamanthaSL No! Thanks for the link, doll!
	1:08am
	1:57am	Watched a video on Hulu. Merciful watched The He in the She (Bones)
	2:05am	Watched a video on Hulu. Merciful gave The He in the She (Bones) 5 stars
	2:22am	“Downloaded Second Life. Flew. Fell in a pond. Sat on a duck. Uninstalled.” — @trojanchad01 http://is.gd/3V3Y
	2:45am	@SamanthaSL Very indicative of the average new user experience, don’t you think?

Personally, I’d rather not clutter up my site with off-topic posts anymore. Which really leads me to wonder: what is my topic, anyway? Until I figure that out, I’ll keep to the broad standards I’ve stuck to the past few years: Does it have anything to do with sex? Can it be relished and played with online? (Obviously, cybersex and porn are the main ingredients there.) Or does it have to do with me? The rest is just fluff when it comes to the focus I want to keep on those main points. Me-stuff being fluffy, but important to my continued good mental health.

In any case, I’ll leave the links n’ ephemera up because I hate deleting posts, but I can hide them.

Yesterday
	1:09am	Posted a note on Tumblr. Playing with Posterous
	1:39pm	Posted 16 tweets on Twitter. (Show Details) Kinda neat, if popularity is your thing: “a daily updating counter..so everyone can see how popular you are.” http://twittercounter.com/ Heh, I’m too used to getting straight As. Didn’t do too good on http://twitter.grader.com/ @Cassandra_K Hey love! *kiss* @roguepuppet Wikipedia claims they’re for a bunch of stuff: http://tinyurl.com/437ro4 And more awareness ribbon meanings: http://tinyurl.com/ytxakl Hahahah A pale brown awareness ribbon is for ending chain emails. I want a dozen of those. @Veronique_B *kiss* Happy weekend, doll. : ) @cala Just read that you got a new apartment. Congrats!! @Veronique_B It’s good to know who you talk to. Mine’s worse: I’m, My, & McCain. Urgh. Me, myself, & McCain. NOT how I wanted to go down. @ThePurpleOne Hi sugar! *muah* @Veronique_B I was going to read up on how it’s calculated, but I got bored too fast. *grin Why am I dabbling with xml? Oh yeah. I forgot, I’m studiously ignoring the dishes. No Twitter IM functionality in the near future. http://tinyurl.com/4gtzfj Also, Twitter’s blog is a Tumblr blog. Neat, I can follow easily. @IBTerri You’re 100 in my book. It’s a silly grading system! @taterunino Morning, sugar. Coffee? @ThePurpleOne Same here. Not my main blog, anyway, and one or two of the others. Eh. I’ll try tonight. : )
	1:43pm	Bookmarked 2 links on Delicious. (Show Details) Welcome :: excla.im TwitterCounter
	7:13pm	Watched a video on Hulu. Merciful gave Serenity (Firefly) 5 stars
	7:13pm	Watched a video on Hulu. Merciful gave Heroes: 100% Back (Heroes) 3 stars
	7:36pm	Posted an item on Plurk. Mercy waves hello, since it’s been a while.
	7:37pm	Posted an item on Plurk. Mercy Hm, I’m not getting alert notifications by e-mail lately. Anyone else?
	8:01pm	Posted a note on Tumblr. A favorite quote
	9:28pm	How to make a dynamic CSS

This page was a first draft, of course, so I made some minor edits when I typed it out. That’s another thing I missed: the backspace key.

So here is the handwritten entry, and below it, the transcribed version. You may notice a few things if you bother to look at the image: It’s written on the back of a ruled page. That’s normal for me, I’m left handed and the binder rings get in my way. The letters veer all over the place. It was dark, and I was not drunk.

We remember 9/11 here in L.A. This is my first time joining any of the activities (memorial celebrations, no bouncers, water slides, or face painting), though, and it’s not quite what I expected.

I’m sitting here in the dusk at a small café around the corner from the event. Who knows where my friends and family have taken of to.  Me, I’m a little uneasy with the festive air after all the tears and sober reflections.  When I asked for the time to head this entry, I got some flirtatious banter to go along with it. Shocking, and a little bit disgusting.  But then, it’s not really, is it?

I suppose we’re all really celebrating life in our own ways. The divorced guy with his jocular pun on ‘time’; the woman in her eye-drawing, plunging-neckline dress who’s pressing her partner into a torturous arc against the pick up counter.  Me, with my pencil and paper, eschewing any modern contraptions for the tactile pleasure of graphite scratching and scrawling its way across the page.

There’s big band music playing and laughter’ it makes me smile, even thouse I still feel quiet, somber.  I don’t feel uncomfortable now, having drawn my parallels.

I may even flirt a little myself.

Summer’s been hellish work-wise and personally, and I’m glad it’s almost over. I haven’t had as much time for my on-line activities as I’d’ve liked the past few months. Most people maintain a distinct line between “real life” and what they do on-line.  I don’t—or at least, I don’t see the division as clearly. Fifty percent of my social life is conducted through my broadband connection. It’s wryly amusing that some still find that sad and odd. Anyway, here’s the break down of my life these past few months: I am not single. This does not curtail my cybersexual activities. (I had a fantastic evening with the luscious Tatsuko last night.) I am not broke. (Thank friggin’ gawd.) My house is torn in half, but I have hopes that the contractor will get the new improved bedroom finished sometime in mid-October. And that’s it, sadly. Oh, and did I mention? I did a DJ named Spin Martin; ‘twas rad, funny, and insanely hot all at once.

Sexually speaking, I’ve little enough to share. I mosey out to the nearest bar and hope that the women there don’t remember me, or if they do, remember me favorably. Sometimes I get lucky. There’re a few things I’ve learned, doing the quick pick up (the wooing and sex and wrap up in under an hour): clean the car. Women don’t like cars that are filled with wrappers and paper coffee cups. That wrinkle of the nose means her libido is dying. She’ll soon be blowing it into a tissue and tossing it aside almost as fast as she does you.  My friend tells that car sex is high school. Me, I say it’s my dirty car or the dirty alley. You’d think this wouldn’t work. Yeah, well it doesn’t, always. Still, you get unpicky partners from time to time. These are the ones that matter, baby.

Lesson number two, they don’t like me. Pretend to be someone else. I’m geeky, dorky, and set in my ways.

There’s another lesson here, but I’ve forgotten it. I’ll update you next month, or whenever I have time. Heh.

One of the blogs I subscribe to recently posted a commentary on a blog post by a virtual (in this case, Second Life) escort—a sex worker who has cybersex for money.  That’s not the issue, sex work is a valid field. Sexism is what bugs me here.  In What Lillie Learned About Men From Second Life Sex, New World Notes‘ Hamlet Au pointed out a few salient points from Lillie Yifu’s post, which talks about how to keep your man from cheating—namely, train him. 

Some of the readers’ commentary set her off on an injured martyr spin: “I see I have sinned, and my sin is telling too much of the truth.”  Not enough truth, though there is some to be found mixed in with the fallacies. (A tactic often used by misogynists and misandrists, among whom I’m counting Yifu.) In her own post, A Page From Men: The Missing Owner’s Manual, offers tips on how to dole out tidbits of sex like Scooby snacks and blatantly states that men just can’t help themselves when it comes to infidelity. In her comments on NWN, however, she notes (and provides references to studies, heh) that affairs arise because of a lack of communication.  Maybe I missed the part of her post where she even hinted that communication was key to a good relationship.

When it comes to getting sex several things work in combination. One is that men have more testosterone, which is what creates immediate sex drive and aggression. The other is that men are more visual in their attraction. The next is that the part of the brain devoted to finding sex and getting it is twice as large in men as it is in women. The last one is that men have a lower startle response. This means a man is more likely to notice a detail that causes arousal, more likely to look, which means a wider radius, and more likely to think about getting sex. Also men’s sex drive while it varies, does not do so as regularly, and does not do so as much. Basically, on average, for a few days a month, women think about getting sex as much as men do all the time.

Men are more visually-oriented when it comes to arousal: myth. The sex-related centers of the male brain are twice the size of a woman’s, true. That men generally have a higher sex drive than women, have more testosterone, think about sex more often—also true. That a man’s lower startle response means he is more likely to think about sex? I don’t know, I couldn’t find a study that suggested that.  Her implication that women are responsible for men’s infidelity?  Blatant bullshit. Men are wired (and remember, this is Stone Age programming) to get out there to spread their genes. And guess what? So are women. Neither men nor women are monogamous by nature. (also, see Hrdy, 1997)

I am very sorry that so many people are so angry and taking it out on me. But then, their husbands do to. That is really the thing that saddens me, how much unresolved anger there is out there, not just in America, not just in the developed world, but in many places. People take what comfort they can in such an environment, but anger, denial, and bargaining won’t make one small dent in the wall that separates so many people in this day and age.

Again the wounded ingénue, Yifu persists in her belief that people are attacking her for causing infidelity.  This farce of a how-to is nothing more than a way for her to express contempt for men and other women. In fact, her whole post boils down to, “don’t blame me if your man is cheating, it’s YOUR fault, but I’ll be nice enough to show you how to train him.” 

Maria Rimbaud makes some amazing points in her comments, in fact, I love her response to Yifu: “If my expecting him to not treat me like a domestic servant causes him to have contempt for me (!) and go out and wave his dick in some other woman’s face (!!) and have contempt for all women as a result (!!!), then I’d say that man isn’t worth having.” Fucking awesome!

Dr. Grohol of Psychcentral responds in his post, Why Virtual Whores Shouldn’t Play Virtual Psychologists.

If this is the “missing owner’s manual” for men, I suggest you throw it away now. Delete your bookmark and move on. The only thing this manual will teach you is how to completely anger any typical man. Because no one — man or woman — wants to be treated like an object that needs “training.”

Yifu takes exception to being called a whore (has she not read Tasty Trixie’s WebWhore Manifesto? There is nothing wrong with whores.), but seems to have no problem referring to a woman’s sex drive as the “slut mode”.

If they come to believe that sex in the relationship is a matter of our hormones, they put us in the slut box. “Is this the slut time of the month? No? OK I’ll watch sports.”

I doubt that Lillie Yifu learned a damn thing about men that couldn’t be gleaned from a quick Google search. But she does a good job at preaching misandry.

We all like references:

Hrdy, S.B., 2000. Raising Darwin’s Consciousness: Sexual selection from a mother’s point of view. Keynote Lecture for Symposium on Gender and Inquiry, Radcliffe Institute for Advanced Study.
Hrdy, S.B. 1997. Raising Darwin’s consciousness: female sexuality and the prehominid origins of patriarchy. Human Nature 8: 1-49
Anokhin AP, Golosheykin S, Sirevaag E, et. al., 2006. Rapid discrimination of visual scene content in the human brain. Brain Research 1093:167-177

Embattled motorsport boss Max Mosley has defended his right to an “eccentric” private life and said he will fight to continue running Formula One. In his first interview since a newspaper published allegations that he engaged in a “Nazi orgy” with five prostitutes, Mr Mosley admitted the scandal had embarrassed his family.

Of course it embarrassed his family.  More so than a number of other sexual proclivities, no doubt.  Nazis and orgies an prostitutes, oh my! Wow, this is starting to sound just like porn, isn’t it? Damn the man for making it real. The sheer enormity of it all. 

Good on Mosley for defending himself.  We do have a right to our fantasies. Even if they’re degrading, prejudicial, sick, twisted, or intolerably boring to other people. Unfortunately, the media has the right to harp on anything that sells. Deviant fantasies of those in the limelight are fodder for them. As for the public, you have to love the hypocrisy. I’d love a sampling of the hecklers’ turn-ons.

And you know, if you don’t like someone’s fantasy, you do not have to participate. What a revolutionary idea.

Via MSN News UK, Mosley defends ‘eccentric’ sex life

Updates on my life? Nothing much in the way of erotica, unless you count autoerotic techniques, escapades with various Second Life toys and characters, and a search for Snork porn.  Oh, and I’ve been on a futanari kick lately, too.  Greatly aided by visits to various virtual venues.  (Like that alliteration?  Admit it, you were a little turned on.)

I haven’t posted with the same frequency as last year, and I’ve been wondering how I could give myself a little kick in the ass to do so.  I’ve noticed a lot of people posting their “Daily Twitter Wrap-ups” or whatever they’re called.  That, obviously, isn’t going to work for me since I post to Twitter frequently, and most of what I say isn’t really that profound.  In fact, it’s mostly piece-meal conversation.  So I have another idea: I’ll post the stuff I like manually (since there doesn’t seem to be another way), and my “favorites” don’t have a feed.  One of the features that Twitter has is tracking.  I, of course, added words like “penis”, “masturbation”, “horny”, and a variety of others.  I also use an external Twitter tool called Tweet Scan that delivers tracked results to my e-mail.  These two tools make the experience even more voyeuristic, bordering on creepy, but hey, what can I say?  That’s me.  The results are sometimes funny, usually boring, and occasionally get in the way of the conversation, but I have a lot of fun with it.

I’ll bring ‘em on later.

It seems that even Mars (yup, the big candy conglomerate) has  gotten into the game. Maybe they’re not truly selling panty hose to guys, but they’re using a guy in hosiery to sell candy. Which is even more fabulous in my opinion. For some reason, the company didn’t think this would fly in the US, but they gave it a shot in New Zealand. A smexy, hot Kiwi man in lingerie? uNF.

Mars sent out casting flyers and bagged a number of guys trying out for the part. You’ll have to view the video for highlights, but they center mostly on one man.  One guy, totally unknowingly, bagged the gig for the commercial that ends with posters and the site emblazoned with “Mark Hathaway had the NUTS to do this” for Snicker’s “Get Some Nuts” advert. Hot.

I can’t think of who the lower image reminds me of, but it’ll come to me.  I’ll have quite the opportunity to reflect.
[addendum] I remember now, it’s that asshole doctor from Grey’s Anatomy. Hah.