I’m thirty years old. Chatting amiably with strangers on Second Life the other night, we started trading the basic asl stats. (Me: 30/F/CA) A twenty-two-year-old user chimed in with a comment about how he likes older women when I disclosed my age. *squish* I think it’s insulting to be called an older woman, except…I like older women. They’re mature, they’re less likely to play games, and more likely to tell you exactly what’s on their minds.
When I talk about older women, I mean only that they’re older than me. No doubt that’s what that…boy meant when he referred to me as one. Thinking back, I can’t remember a single instance when I’ve used the term, and I know I would have. I’ve always found it slightly distasteful; it conjures up memories of boys in junior high school bragging about the “older women” they’d seduced. These women being the teenage babysitter, the next-door neighbor, or even a teacher. “Old” was as subjective then as it is now.
What is it that is so desirable in older women? I can’t speak for others, but I know what draws me in. What attracts me to others is a certain level of maturity, of self-possession, and that isn’t something that all people acquire with age. Confidence, liberal views on sex, love-any type of intimate relationship, acceptance of others as they are, a sense of knowing oneself: that’s all part of maturity. Any woman (any gender actually, though I find it more attractive in women for some reason) with any one of these traits is going to command my attention. Recently I’ve been spending some time with a woman who has each of these attributes, and it’s a constant revelation when we chance upon some subject that reveals her mindset and depth of understanding. While I only met her a short time ago, I’ve decided that I want to grow up and be her. Or someone quite like her. I hope that I can truly deserve the title of Older Woman one day.